I wish I could post some update to our Adoption Story. But, there is none. We’re still waiting. Lord, we’re waiting as patiently as we can. But, it’s getting tough and we’re getting antsy.
This waiting, these empty arms, the wondering, it’s all getting a bit old. I know that God will bring us our kids in good time and I just have to trust him. But, lately, it’s been getting tougher and tougher. We wait and watch others with kids. We wait and get moments with other people’s kids. We wait and we wait and we wait.
I knew I was growing weary but dealing with it. But lately, Cody’s been expressing just how much this wait is wearing on him to his friends. When he starts talking about it, I know it’s really bothering him. And so, then it grows more weary for me because I hate that he feels it too.
It’s an process that’s filled with mix emotions. Searching for kids through the online list often feels too much like online shopping. In our search to find our kids we have to weed out the ones that are not a good fit, so you find yourself looking at the listing much the same way you would a page of clothes when you’re shopping. Then, when you find someone you are interested in, you submit an interest form. That’s when, as Cody says, it’s like fishing. You put your line out there and you wait for a bite. And we wait.
Then you wonder when God is calling you take further action to move this along. Our adoption agency has offices all over Texas. The overall agency has been put on a Monitoring plan 1 which means that they are not doing so hot- they need more monitoring than other facilities. And, they are on corrective action. This often means suspending placements for particular offices. I know that our particular office has not faced the suspension of placements. But, having come from licensing and truly understanding the situation, I hate being with an agency that isn’t complying. And, I’m not confident that they are really fighting for us when they get listings of children. I know there are probably quite a few sibling groups that should be listed online that aren’t.
We’ve thought about switching agencies. In looking at compliance, there’s only one that truly looks better than this one. But, it’s intertwined with my work life. I used to regulate some day cares they own, my co-worker deals with some of their contracts on a regular basis, her contact there is a former employee and so is that person’s husband. And, their website talks about charging for their services. Plus, we just don’t know what kind of set back that would all cause. I just keep praying that God will show us the way.
And, as this wait continues, I keep praying that it will all be over soon, for I know the wait will all be worth it in the end.